The decision to stay home or go back to work may be one of the most difficult decisions a new Mom or an expecting Mom will make. This decision not only affects you, but also your husband and your child or children. Many Moms feel the daily guilt of dropping their child off at daycare in order to go make some money. On the other hand, many stay-at-home Moms feel the daily grind of being at home is just too much to handle. It is a lot to think about and there are many factors to consider. Some Moms feel overwhelmed at the thought of returning to work and not being with their child all day, while others feel overwhelmed with the idea of being stuck at home. Do your research and think it over thoroughly. Ultimately, however, you need to sit down with your spouse and make the decision together.  Here are a few ideas to help you get started.

1. Look at the pros and cons of both returning to work and staying at home. Make a list of them and compare.

2.  Be realistic about what to expect from staying at home. It may sound nice and relaxing, but the reality is it's a lot of hard work.

3.  Talk to other stay-at-home Moms about what they like and dislike about it. This will give you a better understanding of what to expect.

4. If this is your first baby, read some articles or books about child development, discipline and anything else about children you may have questions about. You need to be prepared to raise your baby anyways, but this information will also help you feel less overwhelmed if you decide to stay home.

 

Once you have take into consideration all the factors of whether or not you WANT to be a stay-at-home Mom, then you need to decide if you can afford it.

Can you afford to stay at home?

For the answer to that question you need to figure out your budget and if it allows for the loss of your income. If it does not, then you need to take a deeper look at your expenses and see which things you are willing to cut out or cut down on. There are many interesting ways to cut costs and become more frugal -- things you may not have thought of.

Couponing is one of them and can cut your grocery expenses in half, if you do it the right way. CouponMom.com has a great free e-book that explains in detail how to do this. Also, the Frugal Living section at About.com has lots of other ways to cut costs around the house. Two incomes might sound like a lot more, but in reality you need to factor what you are spending to get that second income. This usually includes money spent on gas, food and clothes. Depending on how badly you want to become a stay-at-home Mom you may consider downgrading to a less expensive car, or house, in order to get your budget to meet your needs.

Finally, you need to take into consideration the cost of daycare. Call around to daycares in your area to get an estimate. On average, childcare for just one child is $300 a month. Factor in those items you would no longer be spending money on if you did not work, plus the daycare, and that second job may not look so great. In fact, many couples find it less expensive for Mom to stay home. Take a look at the example on MommySavers.com to see how your salary may not be as much as you would think. Also, MSN has a great calculator that you can use to evaluate your own income to see if that second income is really worth it.

If after factoring all of this information in you still can not justify quitting your job to stay at home, you may want to take into consideration the option of working from home. There are many legitimate companies out there now that hire people to work from home. I have done it for years. Just be sure to do your research and do not sign up for anything that requires an investment on your part. For more information on how to do research on whether a company is legitimate or a scam, you can download my FREE mini-ebook here. 

Now that you're a SAHM

Now that you are officially a stay-at-home Mom (SAHM), make the best of it. Your baby will grow up faster than you can believe. Enjoy every stage, even the annoying ones. There are many times where you will feel overwhelmed, but just know that every other mother has been in your shoes as well -- and survived! Looking back in a few years, these difficult stages of lack of sleep or potty training, etc., will seem to have flown by. Try to enjoy them now as much as you can, but also remember some of these tips:

  1. Don't forget about your husband. It is easy to get absorbed into your new baby so much that you forget to give much attention to your husband anymore. This relationship needs to remain strong and healthy in order for your entire family to be healthy and happy.
  2. Don't lose your identity. Many women have the majority of their identity wrapped up in their career. Sometimes, once you leave your career, you lose a sense of yourself. You need to redefine yourself -- and not just as a Mommy. You need to have a sense of self outside of being a Mom. Find a new hobby or an activity you enjoy. Making time for yourself sometimes will make you feel guilty, but if you devote time to yourself each week this will make you a better Mommy for the rest of the week!
  3. Find some Mommy friends. If you are used to being at a job all day surrounded by coworkers and friends, you may find the life of a SAHM a little dull at first. Many new Moms, especially, wrap themselves up in their new baby and lock themselves in their house. Soon they may find themselves forgetting how to carry on an adult conversation, talking in baby talk and reporting to their husbands how interesting Sesame Street was that morning. Despite how much we love our children, we do need to interact with adults as well. This will not only be fun but it is also a good chance to share the ups and downs of being a SAHM, as well as getting good advice from other Moms. If you do not already have friends that are Moms, there is probably a Mommies group or playgroup somewhere near you. Playgroups not only give you a chance to socialize with other Mommies but allows your child to learn how to socialize with other children as well. Playgroups USA can help you find a playgroup near you